Rocks
If you missed part one of the Parable of the Sower, it was called Roads which discussed how we can keep children off the wayside path by making sure that we make time together as a family a top priority. I love how God is such a protector of His children and provides clear instructions for us on how we can grow and be successful in making fruit for Him. This parable, which is found in Matthew, Mark, and Luke, speaks of the real troubles that arise in the hearts of people that keep them from their destiny, “Trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified.” (Isaiah 61:3). Therefore, since He is the Gardener, I surely trust Him to give me the best gardening tips for my heart and life!
The rocky soil is the second type of soil discussed in the parable. This is a place of temporary shoot growth and not much root growth. In our Christian school we have worship time and chapel everyday where we teach God’s word and His ways. And in our classrooms, it’s the same...God’s truth, God’s ways, God’s word. This is wonderful, but risky if we have the mindset that, just because children are sitting in the seats, they are building in their hearts. A rock in a cookie jar is still a rock, is it not? Similarly, we aren’t Christian just by association with Christians. Don’t get me wrong- that association is a great way to expose someone to what being a Christian is like! It’s necessary! It’s just not enough. God’s word has to go deeper. That’s the trouble with rocky soil. Jesus says that here the seed is heard and received and springs up quickly but no root is ever formed because of those rocks beneath. In other words, when the good word of God comes to this person, what they hear sounds good. They like the idea of doing right, being kind, serving and loving people. But growing these outward God-fruits takes an inner heart work and the no-root plant won’t do that deep work. When the heart-change is required, they hit a rock.
Let’s think of this in the light of parenting our children. Do you want your child to grow patience? They will be asked to wait. They might get skipped on their turn. They might feel over-looked. This is hard for them. Do you want your child to grow as a leader? They will be called on to serve others. That sounds good but, often times, real acts of service are unseen and can be unappreciated. Does your child always want to be first? The best thing that can happen for them is to be last. Why does it seem to work this way? Because these are the soil conditions at which all of these good fruits grow best from us. These are the inner works that produce the outer fruit.
This can be difficult for parents for a couple of reasons. For one thing, the rocks in our children’s hearts are the places where they may be hard or stubborn or where they just don’t want to give up their way. That’s frustrating and it’s not fun to have to deal with, right? But remember, rocks are hidden under the ground. You can’t see them. Therefore, it’s really the goodness of God to you that He will stick a shovel down into the soil of your child’s heart and let you hear the clink of metal on mineral. Knowing that this is for good, remember that God is the Gardener and then- be brave Parents! Be the shovel in His hand! It’s not love to ignore those hard places, even if it seems quieter, easier, and less messy. Instead, dig until you hit those boulders and then don’t be discouraged! Have an expectation over your child that they can do the work of rock-removal with you and God as their helpers. Teach them God’s way of dealing with the situation. Teach them how to pray and ask God for His help in whatever their heart issue is. Point them to the character of Christ in every hard situation. How else will His fruit ever be formed?
Sometimes it’s a teacher or another child that becomes the instrument in God’s hand. Ouch. Allow heart-pokes Mamma Bear. Remember the purpose of it! Rushing in to stop the excavation doesn’t help! Instead, in the hard, help your child by pointing them to the bigger work of the mining that is being done. I think it is good to take a minute to recognize any pain or the hard part of whatever the trouble may be. That’s just real and helps our children to be genuine with us and with God. Then point them to a Christ-like attitude and call them higher:
“I know it hurts that Mrs. Hughes didn’t pick you to lead that project. Let’s flip this situation around and use it for good. Instead of being hurt and angry, why don’t you help the leader she did pick? Not by trying to take over as a leader but being the best follower that you can be, supporting that leader and putting your whole heart into helping them be successful. That is how leaders are made, by serving first.”
This is a deep, hidden work in the heart of a kid for sure, but what a soft and usable heart that is being formed for Jesus! My postscript here? Forgiveness will often be a big part of this kind of gardening but I cannot think of a fruit more like Jesus to cultivate in a child’s heart than that, can you?
